Memories Of Another Day…..

25 Oct 2009 Comments Off

by Shilpa in Friends Tags: school days, school friends

Saturday, October 24, 2009

“We make emotional investment in friendships and then just let go of them as if they meant nothing. We think we can survive in this world alone…..and then spend our lives trying hard to prove that to ourselves.

The truth is that every old song that we listen to everytime we pass the old haunts, every time the word college is mentioned…..we think of our friends that we have left behind.

We are nothing but a collection of memories and most of them have no meaning without friends. My friends have created my memories…..they also remain in most of my memories.” ~ Vikram Bhatt (Bollywood Director)

Yesterday, out of the blue I received a call from one of my school friend Pallavi Dandekar inviting me for a get together with a couple of friends from school days. Thanks to the social networking site. I was surprised to the hilt. But at the same time extremely happy to hear from someone whom I once knew well during my good-ol school days. That was almost two decades ago. Suddenly, I recollected the beautiful fair looking girl with grey green eyes.  She was a typical Kobra (Koknastha Brahmin) girl Ghare-Gore types. We used to call her Pallu and Mani Maoo (pet Cat with white fur and green eyes). The namkaran was done by none other than the most mischievous brat in my class, Kedar Vadhavkar famously known as Vadya. Guess what he had nick named me?? Spidy. Courtesy: My crazy curly mop.

Change is constant
When our conversation began I realized nothing about Pallavi had changed. She was the same ol person. With the marathi accent still intact despite of being in US for many years after marriage. Infact, I was the one sounding a tad Firangi with my Minglish (Marathi-English) accent. As far as my memory goes I remember Pallavi having no serious hang-ups about herself either about her good looks or otherwise. She was one of the most compassionate, down to earth, warm person I had ever known during my school days who always carried mom made besan laddoos in her tiffin. I remember how she never faltered sharing her entire tiffin generously with others. At the end of the conversation I realised I sounded more confident over the telephone. Everything about me has changed. Few months ago during an online chat Pallavi had remarked “What happened to you? You are looking so good.” I replied “The ugly duckling got transformed into a beautiful swan over the years.” The introvert, unconfident, fiercely shy girl with unconventional looks and crazy curly mop has definitely come a long way. And though going through a rough patch right now on account my health, I did feel good about myself.

Memories die hard…..
There was yet another girl in our class with a strong fan following. Famous for her dented chin and attractive features. She was a character straight out of The Bold & The Beautiful. The Dimple Kapadia look alike Sheetal Deval was named (sexy) Devil by none other than Vadya. Envious to the hoard of  good looking guys she had as her arm candy, I carried a deep secret desire to be like her. I was in complete awe of her. Though I was known for my good singing, I desperately wanted to score on the turf especially where the fan following was concerned. But for a shy back bencher with unconventional looks and hair that looked more like a wig straight out of Ramayan, that seemed quite an unreachable dream.

And, so they say things change………..Eight years down the line my dream did become a reality when I landed my first job. A fan following, which to my utter surprise has been steady even now. It’s only now I realise how unnerving and a BIG pain in the neck it could be. So, watch what you wish for guys……

I still have a vivid memory of a loving and sweet natured teacher. Her mantra to discipline students was not through harsh words or stern punishment. It was just her simple, loving, caring words that worked like Magic. I believe qualities like these have to be innate. It’s that sweetness in one’s heart which naturally seeps out and touches other hearts. It cannot be stopped. I remember how eagerly I used to wait for her class to begin. She was our very sweetest Banerjee Ma’m.

Ground reality
I desperately wanted to be there and jam up with my school friends, share a few laughs and probably their ups and downs too. The sad part was that, much to my dismay I had to make a deliberate excuse to avoid meeting them. All the while knowing how much I love to socialise and interact with people. It is truly heart breaking to do away with what my heart frantically wanted. But the truth was more bitter and brutal. True, people have probelms but their life still moves on. Like mine, none’s life is stuck………… literally. I had nothing to tell them about my life. Yep, things would have been different if health was on my side. But……..

I went into a gloomy mode when my conversation with Pallavi ended. My Mum knew how I was feeling and without wasting a single moment she petted me with compassionate words saying “Things will work out for you. You’ll get another chance. Don’t worry.” For the time being that was enough to pacify me.

Confessions of an honest mind
Once during an online chat with Kedar he confided that his 10/12 years of marriage was falling apart. Very candidly and with no qualms he had divulged details about his personal life and declared he was heading for an inevitable divorce. I was completely zapped with the ease with which he could pour his heart out to someone he met after almost two decades. For a moment I wished I could do the same. But I was just glad with the fact that at least I have shared my life with some of my closest friends who have remained visible in my life for longer than I remember.

It’s quite awkward and inhibiting to share your personal life with someone who has just popped on your life’s radar after almost an eternity. Not that it’s impossible. But to build confidant, reliable relationships you have to toil hard and nurture them. And that’s years and years of hard work. Right now, with allergy breathing down my neck every moment, I’m not sure I want to work on any new relationship in between all other things that are a priority in my life right now leave aside acquaintances’ bumped at the social networking sites.